Lawyers love language. And yet, we can be recklessly careless with language when it comes to making our profession more inclusive. Today, and over the course of this series, two lawyers—a lawyer who identifies as a white Gentile husband in a Jewish family which includes an adult son and a non-binary teenager and a lawyer who identifies as a Christian, disabled, white woman— will introduce you to common scenarios where we have trained our brains to battle our unconscious bias and adopt more inclusive language. We invite you to learn from our own mistakes, and how others held us accountable, in common situations where we can Break Language Habits and build a more inclusive legal environment for our clients, our colleagues, and our loved ones. 

Last time, we covered practices to avoid making assumptions about gender or relationship status in our use of pronouns and titles. This week, we'll talk about embracing gender neutrality across our language more broadly as we conclude this series on inclusive language.

To revisit the scene from my office a few weeks ago:

Staff: “A judge called for you.”

My brain: “What did he say?”

Why does my brain automatically assume a judge is male? Well, because for centuries, all judges were men. Because even now, most still are. Because the default in Roman languages has been to use masculine pronouns and phrases when a gender-neutral term would work fine. We make these linguistic assumptions because they have been true and because we have been conditioned to believe male pronouns cover everyone. They don’t, and we can use our language now to help.        

Support staff member: “A judge called for you.”

Attorney: “What did they say?”

This might seem like PC culture run amok, but cognitive studies have long shown that “even what might be deemed frivolous aspects of language can have far-reaching subconscious effects on how we see the world.”[1]

For example: In German, a key is referred to be a masculine identifier. In Spanish, a key is feminine. When shown a picture of a key and asked to describe it, native German speakers referred to the key as hard, heavy, jagged, metal, and useful. Native Spanish speakers referred to the key as golden, intricate, little, lovely, and tiny. Same object, but because of the gendered language, our brains perceive it differently.

Switch it around: In German, “bridge” is feminine and speakers described bridges as beautiful, elegant, fragile, pretty, and slender. In Spanish, “bridge” is masculine and speakers described bridges as big, dangerous, strong, sturdy, and towering.

This might seem like fun cocktail party trivia, but studies have found that gendered language tends to lead to gender prejudice in behaviors.[2] Even when adjusting for cultural differences, when a speaker uses gendered language, language shapes thought: for example, research shows gendered language tends to lead to greater differences in gendered pay equity.[3]

Again, this is about tricking our own brains out of socialized, unconscious language.

A final word on inclusive language

We covered a lot of ground in this Break Language Habits series, from the importance of correctly pronouncing names to erring on the side of caution when using a person’s title. Maybe you highlighted and annotated each of these articles, just as my high school freshman did their copy of The Odyssey. Maybe one of the pieces really resonated with you, and you started some thoughtful conversation among your colleagues about how you could all work to be more inclusive in your space. Or maybe you rolled your eyes and wanted to throw tomatoes at us with each article. Regardless of where you find yourself, these tips have helped us on our journey to “be better” in our inclusive language habits:

1. Accept this will take time and effort. Committing to changing a habit takes time and effort. There are plenty of books, blogs, podcasts devoted to habits—probably even one from Malcolm Gladwell—if you want to learn about it. We can also provide anecdotes of several New Year’s resolutions that back up this research. Much like all other habits, in the space of developing more inclusive language, suffice it to say, you will only improve if you try. But the more you try, the more you will improve.
   
   
2. Accept that you will mess up. (See the previous bullet point about changing habits.) In the course of writing this series, the co-authors made multiple mistakes that we caught for each other. Jessica wrote “Mothers know best,” and Todd changed it to “Parents know best.” Todd wrote, “when I was a ballboy,” and Jessica changed it to “ball kid.” We both thanked each other for helping hold us accountable; how great it is to have a friend who has your back! You’re going to mess up. When you do, apologize very briefly, and move on. In the comfort of your own time, and maybe with a trusted colleague or friend, revisit when/why your gaffe occurred in an effort to adjust your language choice in similar situations moving forward.
   
   
3. Accept this isn’t about you. While it is about you making changes in your own life, inclusive language is about using terminology that welcomes everyone into important conversations. “You know what I meant,” “I’m too old for this,” “Damn, you can’t say anything now without the PC Police,” or other defensive reactions are, to be blunt, trash. De-centering yourself and exercising The Platinum Rule (treat others how they want to be treated) is essential to inclusivity, but more important, to respect. You rightfully expect people to treat you with respect, and you have the same responsibility to extend this courtesy to everyone you encounter.

And don’t stop with changing your own habits. Be sure to proactively compliment and thank other lawyers and judges who use purposeful language. As a former teacher, I can testify that adults like their gold stars just as much as kindergarteners do. When I emailed a lawyer last week and their automatic reply popped back, “Out on parental leave, please contact so-and-so,” I wrote back how much I appreciated their inclusive language use of “parental” (instead of “maternity” or “paternity”) leave. And thus, we took a teeny, tiny step on our mountain of creating a more inclusive profession. Which, to be honest, is all my legs would carry me anyway.

Jessica Heiser is the Founder and CEO of Imprint Legal Group, a nationwide network of diverse employment, trial, and civil rights lawyers and consultants who have extensive training in diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) and change management practices. Imprint Legal Group empowers organizations by addressing compliance and culture. Jessica is a former teacher, an attorney, and a Northwestern University-certified practitioner of Leading Equity and Inclusion in Organizations. You can reach her at jheiser@imprintlegalgroup.com.

Todd Shumaker joined Church Church Hittle & Antrim’s sports law group after working at the NCAA National Office where he served as a chair of the Enforcement Inclusion Guiding Team and as a member of the leadership team for the LGBTQ-A+ Employee Engagement Group. He currently serves on the Indiana State Bar Association’s Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity Committee. You can reach him at tshumaker@cchalaw.com.

This article is the fourth part in the Break Language series. Check out Part One, "What's in a Name? An Entire Identity of Which We Should Be Respectful," Part Two, "Hillary & Trump: How We Refer to Women (and Men)," and Part Three, "Yes, Your Honor(ific): The Potential Problems with Misplaced Manners."